I was trying to come up with a catchy title for this post, then I tried to come up with a title that would summarize this post, and I just couldn’t do it. I don’t know if it’s because this is the first time that I am writing anything besides a shopping list and a few emails in the last 2 months and my brain has been taking a vacation, or if it’s because there is no good way to describe what has happened since I shut down my business on March 13th and only left the house about 5 times in 9 weeks. It’s “UNPRECEDENTED!”
If you had asked me what I would do if I was stuck at home for 9 weeks and unable to go anywhere or see anyone in person, I would have told you that I would have lost my mind, would have Marie Kondo’d my house to perfection, would have cooked wild and amazing recipes and would have developed an insane case of cabin fever. Spoiler alert – NONE of those things happened. Many people that I’ve talked to in these last couple of weeks seem to have had a similar experience. I think that the uncertainty of the whole thing has caused many of us to feel like we are living in limbo. If I would have been told that I would have 9 weeks at home and then after that I was returning to my normal life, I would have planned the crap out of those 9 weeks. Everyone that knows me knows that I am a planner. It can be crazy annoying (even to me), but it is also great for efficiency and prevents procrastination. I would have made a schedule and given myself tasks for each week, day and likely each minute. I would have prepared a list of recipes, made my shopping lists and ensured that I had everything that was required for these recipes in my kitchen. I would have made a curriculum for my 1.5 year old daughter and made sure that our days were filled with learning opportunities, plenty of outdoor time, crafts and planned nap times.
Do you want to know the craziest part of all of this? I’m pretty sure that our experience was actually far better than what I would have planned. I was more relaxed about everything because I didn’t have any idea what was coming next. I couldn’t plan any outings, but we found out that my daughter and I both LOVE to be at home and we found new kinds of spontaneous creativity, exploration and learning opportunities. I did start to cook different things, but I learned that Emma only has the attention span for a short and easy recipe so we found some great “staple” recipes. I didn’t Marie Kondo 1 SINGLE THING! I absolutely cherished my time with Emma, and with us being home so much more, most of my “free” time was spent cleaning. I didn’t want to take up any of our time in a closet or sorting through papers. We spent HOURS outside – we picked wildflowers, dandelions, and weeds. We played with bugs, rocks, sand, sticks and any other random thing we found. We went on an hour-long walk everyday, no matter what the weather was like. We gardened, played in her playhouse, biked, and Emma rode in her electric Jeep. And….we got chicks! What a great learning experience for all of us! Now that I’m back to work, I feel so lucky that I was able to spend that time with Emma and will cherish that time for the rest of our lives. Being quarantined was an incredible experience for my daughter and I, but we do realize how lucky we are to have outdoor space and live in a more rural area where we could walk outside and be very far away from everyone.
One of the more difficult parts of quarantine was shutting down my business. At the beginning I was racing to figure out telehealth and trying to create other ways that I could still work. Turns out that it was impossible while being the only caretaker of a toddler during my husband’s work hours. The second I would open my computer, it didn’t matter what Emma was doing, she would race over to me and either pound on the keyboard or cry for me to stop. She usually entertained herself well when I was cleaning or doing something else around the house, but I swear, if I even thought about working she would get upset. Everyday when she took her nap, I would use every second of it to work on some online continuing education courses. It was a great way to still be connected to my career and learn new things that would be helpful to my patients upon my return.
The other thing that was very helpful through this time was knowing that I wasn’t alone. Unfortunately, so many people had to shut down their businesses and figure out how to survive without income, yet still pay all of the bills. I talked to some of my colleagues and it was great to feel such camaraderie and support. I also knew that I wasn’t alone as a working parent suddenly turned into a full-time stay-at-home-mom. I talked to some of my neighbors (from a distance, of course) and realized that we all had very different situations, yet they were all challenging in some way. Some people still had 2 essential jobs, yet now there was no school or childcare. Some had also become stay-at-home-parents and were now taking a crash-course in homeschooling. Some worked in the medical field and were worried about the possibility of carrying the virus back to their homes. Everyone’s situation seemed to be unique, yet we were all bonded by the fact that we were striving to figure out this “new normal” and what it meant to our families and our way-of-life. No one is alone in this. Our experiences and perspectives are all very unique, but everyone is having to figure things out day-by-day. The fact that the entire world has been turned upside down is horrible, yet at least we know that we are all in this together and we will persevere.
The other difficult part of this situation is the complete uncertainty and the fear. Even before COVID-19, it was becoming more difficult to trust the media and discern whether something was “fake news.” I had stopped watching the news completely a couple of years ago because it seemed to give me more feelings of anxiety rather than an education of current events. Now that I was home 24 hours a day, the news seemed like my connection to the outside world and the best way to get updates about the health crisis. At first, it seemed like they were reporting true facts, but as time has gone on it’s become harder to sort out fact from opinion from political agenda. I guess that it is bound to happen with any situation, but unfortunately the outcome for many of us is distrust, loss of a sense of direction, and the worst – fear.
Fear is one of the most harmful emotions to the human body and spirit. Obviously, fear is great in certain instances to help us with decision-making and avoiding injury and harm. If we didn’t feel fear, we wouldn’t have made it very long as a species! But as a body worker and business owner, I see fear in some very negative places as well. Fear can limit us from our true potential, it can render us motionless when pivotal life opportunities present themselves, and we can also hold onto fear both mentally and physically, leading to a myriad of health conditions. Most people that have really succeeded throughout their lives have had to face and overcome many fears along the way. What makes fear about COVID-19 different is that the consequences are so unknown. Every choice that we make in regards to wearing masks, social distancing, flying on airplanes and having social gatherings doesn’t have any kind of clarity in the end result. If we relax restrictions, this virus could spread like wildfire and then we could have more illness, death and complete economic collapse. But if we socially isolate, no one knows the repercussions that could come of that either. We most surely will have economic collapse, but might also have more illness and death of a whole different kind. NO ONE KNOWS! Despite all of the opinions, political games, real news and fake news, NO ONE KNOWS! Fear is bound to arise in a situation of complete and utter uncertainty, but I think that for our own mental and physical well-being, we should focus on the things that we CAN control.
- Loving our families and friends as much as we can and within the comfort zones of each person. Please ask people before you take off your mask, or go in for that hug. I know that it seems awkward, but none of us know what another person is feeling, and it might change by the minute. Do Zoom meetings, Facetime calls, text, or don’t! I think that there is pressure to be in contact with people constantly now that we can’t go out and see them. What if this was just the break that you needed to get to know yourself a little better? We are seeing examples everywhere of Mother Nature healing after a much-needed break. What if this is also our much-needed break? Don’t feel guilty about anything right now. No one knows what is better or right. You do you!
- Taking the time to calm our minds and bodies. Avoid letting the fear and anxiety creep in. I know that meditation means something different to everyone, and for some people it has a negative connotation. Meditation does not mean that you have to sit cross-legged while doing your “ohms.” Meditation comes in so many different forms, but the best part of meditation (as I know it) is getting your mind to slow down and focus on something else besides whatever is going on in your head right now. I’m not going to go through all of the different kinds of meditation, but do a google search and I’m sure you will find some great resources. If nothing else, stop what you are doing, close your eyes and take a deep breath. Sometimes, that is all that we need to reset a little bit.
- Get some fresh air! Unless you are stuck on a cruise ship in an inside cabin (that is my worst nightmare), open a window, get outside if you can, and breath in that now cleaner air! With so much less pollution recently, the air should be a little better to breathe in and will get some good oxygen into those lungs and into our cells. When I was growing up, whenever we were sick or in a bad mood, my mom would tell us to go outside and walk around the house a few times. We always drug our feet because it was usually the last thing that we felt like doing, but wouldn’t you know it, it always made us feel better! Sunlight and fresh air are a form of therapy in themselves and where I’m located in the Denver area, they are usually pretty easy to come by.
This is just my experience and my opinions throughout the COVID-19 pandemic. Read if you want, take what you will out of it, and hopefully you can connect with this in some way. I know that everyone seems to have a different opinion about this situation, and everyone has experienced it very differently depending on where you live and who you know. I wish nothing but the best for our lives, our economy and our world. Let’s spread love and positivity as much as we can in this unprecedented time. Thank you.
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